All the Single Ladies...

If you don't hear Beyonce in your head right now, I'm not sure we can be friends...

In all seriousness, I hatched these intricate daydreamy plans of how I would spend my COVID-19 Quarantine downtime, and let me tell you that whole thing went out the window in a big ole hurry.

I work twice the hours to support students and teachers, troubleshoot issues that some up in the moment, and wake up at 3:27am with astonishing regularity devising plans to stay ahead of what might come next. Working and serving in education right now equates with laying the pavement two seconds ahead of an Indy car. It's the second-best thing I can be doing with my time right now.

The role I'm finding the most puzzling is the one I usually feel like I'm navigating well--Mom-ness.

My kids aren't little anymore. They are 16 and 18 now. Little adults. And this has hit them in vastly different ways.

My senior is struggling. The tug-o-war between understanding that this unprecedented time in our history will define the future of the world versus the unfairness of missing out on so many huge milestones versus getting our heads around how each individual's choices and behaviors can absolutely impact the livelihood of those in our community. It's A LOT.

My heart really breaks for her. It breaks for me. I have been playing the tape in my head of her last little girl everythings for so song, and those things aren't going to happen. Her last solo performance singing on a stage, her last dance, her last day of walking through the halls at school, saying bye to this part of her life and stepping into the next chapter of her life. It will all just be so different.

And then there's me.

Which brings me back to the title.

If you're a single mom, this is hard. It was already hard, but we'd figured out our way in doing this thing, right? Now it's just us minus distractions. I can't go to yoga, the gym, the movies, to my favorite little spots to see people I adore. I'm staying home, just like I hope you're doing.

I talked with another single mom friend of mine this week who asked me, "Is it just me or is this just REALLY isolating?" Yes, it is. I have a million amazing friends.  And they are busy taking care of their families. Like we all should be taking advantage of this time to reflect and focus on those closest to us. They are focused on their husbands and children.

I'll just say it.

The world feels uncertain. It feels a little too quiet. A little too isolated. A little bit scary because we don't know what tomorrow looks like. There's something to be said for having someone to tell you that it'll be alright. That you'll get through this together. That whatever happens, you aren't walking through it all by yourself.

So that sounds super Gen X!

Time for a solution! This evening, I scheduled girls' night online. I made a silly invitation and texted it with Zoom code to a bunch of my girlfriends. We all just needed to see some familiar, smiling faces and talk about completely random things like we usually would. Making time and expending a tiny bit of effort meant that my kitchen was filled with friends again, full of laughing and getting the scoop on what's new with everyone.

The simple things.

The important things.

Investing in people and in ourselves, being grateful for our relationships, and nurturing them in the midst of what has to be the craziest time for our generation.

So connect. Reach out. Be available. And take care of yourself because this is not a contest and the only way we get through this is together. But 6 feet apart.

Big air hugs, friends!